here's tremendous growth that happens when people are faced with challenging
things. And i think... "i" think...God gives us room to really develop our
"free will" in all kinds of circumstance in life not just the easy areas.

The more training the better soldier.
Keep fighting...even if you feel like you are loosing most of the fights.
As long as you are fighting in the smallest way...you are still FIGHTING.
And know that fighting a "good war" - against the self is going to pay off!
...even if its just in Heaven
...but Heaven is really what matters anyway
...and life will pass by faster then eternity ever will.
In Heaven we'll be able to really see how our efforts payed off.

So don't feel like God doesn't accept you because you "keep screwing up"
God looks at your effort to keep fighting not the body count.
Even Paul the "saint" said this him self:

Philippians 3:13-14
13" No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it,
but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past
and looking forward to what lies ahead,
14 I press on to reach the end of the race and receive
the heavenly prize for which God,
through Christ Jesus, is calling us."

The plan is to keep at it!
You know God is close to us and even closer when we feel like we are
sinners or week and unable.
Remember that parable of the two men praying in the temple:

Luke 18:10-14
13 “But the tax collector stood at a distance and dared not
even lift his eyes to heaven as he prayed.
Instead, he beat his chest in sorrow, saying,
‘O God, be merciful to me, for I am a sinner.’
14 I tell you, this sinner, not the Pharisee,
returned home justified before God.
For those who exalt themselves will be humbled,
and those who humble themselves will be exalted.”

Keep fighting!

I'm saying this to you because i'm saying that to my self as well.
I think every true God seeker has a sin they have to battle while on Earth.
This is what humbles us and what makes us more dependable on God
verses our own success and pride.

God came to save the helpless and the week. We are on the right track. hah!

You have to remind your self of the truth in the Bible.
Heaven is our goal.

I hope when i write all this that you don't feel i'm being preachy.
I guess it helps me to refocus my self when i see my thoughts in writing..."